I have travelled abroad after a long time. It was Pakistan and its various cities that had consumed me all these years. As the culture of intolerance and selfishness evolved in Pakistan, we blamed the west for incarnating us into this new self. We find every Pakistani lamenting the country going to the dogs. Many among us believe that the country has not lived up to the expectations of its founding fathers. Many others think the country has forsaken the ideology of Pakistan (whatever that ideology means). Last but not the least, the country is thought to have forgotten the message of Islam. We have created many imaginary characters and situations to put the blame on. At the end of the day, Pakistanis are innocent people spoiled by a conspiracy against them. And who could be these conspirators other than the Indians and the Jews? Interestingly, the entire security paradigm the country has built over the last 67 years rests on this thesis. Still we have been unable to handle these conspirators and thwart their evil designs. We keep falling into the trap, becoming exactly what they wanted us to become. The question is: why did we allow our enemies to design us with their evil mind? If we knew the enemies and their ambitions, what stopped us from keeping them at a distance or frustrating their nefarious plans? Why did we keep piling our garrisons with missiles and other weapons but refrain from building minds with the fineness necessary to understand what lies in the way to becoming a good human being?The budgetary burden of defence has built up and has eliminated neither the enemy nor its spectra. We are proud of building drones but not a bit shameful about keeping more than half of the population illiterate. No wonder we spend hardly three percent of the GDP on education and less than five percent on health while spending 60 percent on defence! Still, the enemy is gaining teeth and has been able to destroy our generations, as the saying goes, by coming into our bedrooms through televisions, DVDS and all such gadgets. Here we are, a spoiled nation, and the blame for this waywardness lies with the west, the east too, where India and Afghanistan lie, not to forget the Middle East where the Jews live. However, why is it that countries like the UAE, where I am presently spending my time, are law abiding nations that too with nearly 200 different communities living side by side? Why is it that nobody here shows a bit of intolerance at the cash counters of crowded supermarkets? Why is it that people here do not honk at all even when locked in a bumper-to-bumper traffic jam? Why is it that people only cross the road at the zebra crossing and not otherwise? Why is it that most of the time drivers stop their cars to let pedestrians cross the road? Why is it that nobody here is in a hurry? Why is the country as peaceful as a shrine despite being one of the only three countries that accepted the Taliban government in Afghanistan in 1996 and is deeply involved today in the Yemen war? Though many people are toiling here like donkeys and are living like insects, barring a few, most of these people still look fresh, calm, composed and worthy of being called human beings. I have been wondering why we have so many enemies and this Gulf state has none? Is it only because they have petrol and we do not? I have come to know that schools in the UAE have a very strict appraisal system for both the teachers and students, failing which could mean an end of a career either for the teacher or a strenuous academic life ahead for the students. In Pakistan, is not teaching a profession either for all those who have nothing better to do or for those who have a knack to fleece others in the name of Oxford, Cambridge or Oxbridge syllabi and systems? We have a slew of grammar schools spread across the length and breadth of urban cities and an equal number of schools running without sanitation, toilets and — not to forget — teachers. The Sindh government takes the cake in this regard despite spending the highest on education among all the four provinces. What we are seeing here is a pattern of spending and not spending at the same time. Maybe, here too, is an enemy working against us. At times, I think we have personified, because of overuse, the enemy and have become an enemy for our own selves. Does the world, with so much in its hands, have the time to think about us or to conspire against us every second? The only thing they are bothered about is our ability to create and nurture terrorists in the garb of so-called jihadists. Our value would have been less than a dime had we not been sitting on a geostrategically important part of this earth. The crux of this whole discussion is that we need to wake up, take responsibility for our doings and mend our ways. The UAE is not a place carved from haven. It is man made and as notorious as a jungle with all kinds of beasts to take advantage of one another but rule of law and good governance have made it tolerable and liveable, in spite of all the odds. The lesson lies perhaps in accepting that hell is not other people, but us, our own selves. The writer is a freelance journalist with an academic background in public policy and governance. She can be reached at marium042@gmail.com