A trophy wife by popular definition is an attractive woman who is held as a status symbol for a man, her husband. Her sole job would be to look pretty and attractive so her husband can enjoy a certain position in society. Pakistan, a country practically drowning in the patriarchal culture takes this concept to the next level. So while your average trophy wife has the freedom to go outside and spend her husband’s money as she pleases, (cuz hey you gotta take something out of being his status symbol, right?) the average Pakistani trophy wife can’t even do that because you have to report all your comings and goings to your lord and protector, your husband and may God save you if you go somewhere without informing His Highness. Now while the typical trophy wife enjoys spa trips and implants, a desi trophy wife is expected to look her best without extra help even if she is past the age of fifty and her husband resembles a sack of potatoes. If you are diabetic or suffer from an illness that requires you to take medication that causes you to gain weight, well good luck avoiding the snide comments and long sighs because your husband’s right at eye candy is way more important than your health, sweetheart. The Pakistani trophy wife culture demands you go out and look your best, and by your best, we mean whatever has been deemed the best by society. So if you are dark-skinned, even slightly overweight, have acne, grey hair, or just about anything that is completely out of your control, good luck making friends with all the other trophy wives. Desi friendships are of course a whole other topic for another rainy day… You will be expected to look a certain way with absolutely no help from your significant other apart from the-oh-so helpful remarks of “you’re getting fat.” You will be expected to take these remarks in a positive manner, of course, accepting that he is only trying to help and only wants what is best from you. This, of course, has nothing to do with him being embarrassed when he takes out. If he takes you out. Social gatherings do not count as they are a social construct meant to show you off to his friends and family if you fit in their perception of beauty. If you don’t, your man is likely to resent you for existing. They also, of course, are the perfect place for them to display their oh-so-brilliant sense of humor which will basically involve them objectifying you and your mere existence because this is, of course, the only way to show off their masculinity. You will be expected to sit there and smile, accepting these jokes and know in your heart that “what sounds disrespectful to you is just his sense of humor and his way of appreciating you” because hey a simple compliment is too mainstream. So remember ladies, if your husband tells you you’re fat, jokes about getting another wife or asks you to report to him about wherever you go. He is not at all a control freak neither is he insensitive. He simply loves you to death. The writer is a twenty-two-year-old marketing student completely obsessed with Harry Potter and F Scott Fitzgerald with a strong love for coffee and rain.