There was a flood of messages and calls over social media and phone, as the news of my resignation from Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaf (PTI) got out. Some admired my courage, while others questioned my loyalty and some declared me as an opportunist. My close friends knew that this decision came after a long battle with myself. For a long time, I felt helpless about the ideology that PTI promoted and it was not aligned with the idea of change in meaningful terms. I believe in loyalty to causes and my decision to leave PTI came after the realisation that the party was no more loyal to its promised cause. People voted for change but PTI politics proved to be just another effort to establish tried and tested mechanisms. The divisive alliance with the Jamaat-e-Islami (JI) and its dominance in Khyber Pakhtunkhwa’s (KP) policies were quite alarming. Voters of PK-95 (Lower Dir) and supporters of change were let down when JI, PTI and other political parties agreed that women would be barred from casting their votes. The electoral alliance with the notorious ASWJ in Mirpur and Haripur was extremely worrying us progressives. The final nail in the proverbial coffin of my idealism was allocation of a grant worth Rs. 300 million to a madrassa known for training militants. I wasn’t the only one to challenge this decision but Imran Khan’s response was baffling, to say the least. He blamed the chief minister for the decision on one side while defending it in the media on the other. In no way I am suggesting that religious seminaries shouldn’t be provided grants, but such grants should be used as leverage to reform them and improve the quality of education. One wonders why a specific madrassa was chosen when there are other schools in the province that are in dire need of help. Youth and overseas Pakistanis, once declared as the ‘backbone of the party’ by Khan, were almost forgotten. All the mesmerising slogans of Naya Pakistan were nothing more than political stunts. Youth were exploited only to increase presence in mass protests for political gains. I commend the bravery of workers who dreamt of a revolution but were treated like dirt in the end. Moreover, certain youth leaders were ‘selected’ as poster boys to falsify the myth. People still haven’t forgotten on how certain founding members were sidelined to provide space for opportunists. Imran Khan often talks about equality and rule of law but his party follows a similar mentality found in others where workers are disrespected and undervalued. He needs to realise that without the support of grass root workers, no election can be won. He loves to refer to western democracies but unfortunately fails to follow their footsteps even in his own party, where internal elections are nothing more than gimmickry. Infact, it is the difference of opinions which demands respect in political parties. However, workers are forced to oblige to their leader’s wishes and fail to ‘think-out-of-the-box’. Hence, it was difficult for me to adapt to the opinions of others without questioning them. The party suffers to such an extent that it is filled with cult following and confusing ideologies. Khan’s obsession and efforts to end financial corruption are commendable but for me, moral corruption is far more concerning. I seek to ensure my fundamental right to life, liberty and security but sadly, PTI has largely failed in this objective while shamelessly promoting bigotry. Neither did I join the party for personal gains not resigned over some petty reasons. If one reads the manifesto then would realise that how it shifted to the far-right spectrum. Lately, Ali Muhammad Khan’s open threat to seculars reflects the leadership’s mentality towards progressive Pakistanis. Imran Khan has clearly failed not only me but scores of other Pakistanis as well. Sloganeering can provide supporters on social media but votes, hardly. The author is a human rights and peace activist, and a political strategist. She tweets @MalaikaSRaza