Every day is an excruciating ordeal for Pakistani women as they choose which battles to fight and which stumbling stones to cut short their journey. Deeply entrenched in age-old traditions and norms, patriarchy reigns supreme, exerting its oppressive grip on every aspect of society. From the workplace to the home, from the streets to the halls of power, the toxic manifestations of patriarchy are all-pervasive, stifling the voices and aspirations of half the population – women. The recent controversy surrounding the Directorate General of Immigration and Passports serves as a stark reminder of the deeply ingrained patriarchal attitudes that prevail in the country. A committee is said to have been formed by Interior Minister Mohsin Naqvi to come up with the best way forward for women forced to carry their husbands’ names on their passports, especially when the country’s national ID database allows them to retain their father’s names even after a change in marital status. More worryingly, the relevant director-general believes that the divorced women should still carry the names of their former spouses The rationale behind this decision? To prove the parentage of any children! While the intentions may have been well-meaning (there has indeed been an uptick in legal complications in the wake of separated couples), the implication is crystal clear – women are supposed to be identified by their male counterparts. As if someone putting up a fight against ghosts of their past needed another reminder to live through their nightmares. Mr Mustafa Jamal Kazi may not be finalising a government policy but his opinion does reflect the societal mindset, which, in this day and age, still wishes to see a woman through the eyes of a man. By seeking to impose a checklist condition on females, he not only perpetuates the narrative of women as chained to a single marriage throughout their lifetime but also sandbagging them to the whims of a man they must have had more than enough good reason to part ways with. Some thoughts are best if kept to oneself. *