The reports about the coming of a really compact and efficient 15-member federal cabinet retaining only the incumbents not tainted by the National Reconciliation Ordinance (NRO) are really heartening to learn. The government at last seems to have realised the reason to reverse the blunder of a bloated cabinet in a highly crisis-ridden economy. A large cabinet certainly could not be justified in the presence of escalating external and internal debts, rising angst against the donors, a crippling civil war, and mounting misery and inflation. The stark reality of a Rs 200 billion proposed cut in the already dwindling development budget requires every penny to be pinched to pre-empt spiralling hunger and desperation. Even if the country could quite afford a crore a year for every minister, the amount would be far better spent to improve the lot of a hundred medium sized villages or to subsidise food, fuel and fertilisers. Larger cabinets are also quite contrary to the contemporary trends of trimming administrative costs in modern democracies and organisations. The access, reach and efficiency of a single minister can be multiplied manifold simply by using the current communication facilities. Even a medium sized cabinet is functioning pretty well in Punjab. Thus the federation, rather than gathering a bigger bulk, must demonstrate that it can perform even more efficiently with less human power. Prime Minister Gilani, however, must certainly be under intense pressure to increase his flag-fluttering flock. These pressures can be better countered by carving a widely acceptable pragmatic criterion for induction. Any such formula may be based on a blend of personal attributes, experience, devotion and knack for solving public problems and some other similar suitable stipulations. Piety, like General Zia’s futile quest for the most pious and virtuous dozen associates to transform the destiny of this nation, obviously cannot be a feasible criterion. Some of his piety-pushing associates later turned out to be not that pious. Piety also cannot be measured by common human faculties as some proponents tend to correlate it with the length of beard, pyjamas or rosaries. Actually piety being an innate set of attributes may be better left to the Creator’s judgment, relying on some more tangible selection standards.Height, chest size or body mass ratios routinely adopted for beauty contests, fashion models and army and other security recruits could form another set of criteria. This would even please our discarded dictator General, whose continued protection has been one of the principal pursuits of the present cabinet. This, however, may soil the much vaunted civilian façade of the government, stigmatising it for being so overtly under the shadow of the same sovereign boss. To some, the criteria even may seem irrelevant as ministers — unlike security personnel — are not meant to endure tough and rigorous physical assignments. It may be a contravention of the precedents as a person of the size and girth of Jamali has already served as a premier. The human rights enthusiasts may similarly denounce it as a blatant discrimination based on inherited features and hence an evident infringement of the constitution. To overcome this, one would rather prefer the parameters founded on skills, style, confidence, and the public trust and qualities acquired through personal rigour and grooming like speech, couture, coiffeur, charisma, bearing, popular esteem, service and standing in street politics. The taste to turn out in an impressive attire may be prescribed an essential criteria especially when the premier himself is known for his wardrobe of swell suits and snazzy ties. A textile minister in a previous government was so obsessed with his over-lordship of the garment sector that he refused to attend a Senate committee meeting without his most favourite outfit. The dress rule, however, could be equally divisive, as some ministers may prefer their regional costumes while others, being overtly religious like the JUI stalwarts, may refuse to slip into trousers. Eloquence and articulation could be a very rational criterion for ministers as they have to explain and defend the cabinet policies, even the most illogical, obtuse and non-existent ones. But this would be quite difficult to enforce in a country where even the persons stuttering like remotely wired robots were paraded as premiers. Eloquence may inevitably stir the question of a particular language or dialect, and the eloquence of Syed Naveed Qamar, already a formidable minister, is certainly far less impressive than the size of his moustache. Kaira, another towering minister, is no match for the measured poise and eloquence of Ahsan Iqbal. A more pertinent and pragmatic option thus would be a formula founded on the egalitarian principle that all MNAs are equal and eligible to become ministers and thus must be offered an opportunity to prove their mien and mettle. A more viable and fairer policy thus is to draw lots for 15 incumbents from the aspirants and induct them as ministers for a period of nine months. The coalition partners, as in the present system, can be accommodated by a similar selection from among them. The names of these incumbents then should be dropped from the next draw to pick up anther team for the same tenure. Relatively more illustrious performance should be rewarded in the allocation of more coveted ministries and more participation in foreign conferences. Some critics perhaps would be quick to quip that I have ignored education, intellect or the intelligence quotient, which is taken as an integral ingredient of cutting edge assignments in many countries. This, however, is also quite controversial. Similarly, the strictures for any academic attainment for the legislatures being already scrubbed by the Supreme Court cannot, inter alia, be sustained for its ancillary cabinet cadres. Anyway, this is still a graduate assembly and all members have been sufficiently intelligent to woo the masses and to toe the line of the power wielding and reigning leaders. This is demonstrated by the PPP’s legislators’ swift, subtle and stupefying strategy to scuttle Amin Fahim’s ascent to the super slot. So, all members being sufficiently intelligent, are equally eligible for induction. The recipe of rotation is thus left as a worthwhile and practical option to rid the nation of the ordeal of large and cumbersome cabinets. The writer is an academic and freelance columnist. He can be reached at [email protected]