It is often said that a picture speaks louder than a thousand words. If you have seen the visuals of the prime ministers of both India and Pakistan at the recent South Asian Association for Regional Cooperation (SAARC) conference, you will know exactly what this saying truly means. Based on media reports, both premiers shared the same stage but completely ignored one another. When Prime Minister (PM) Nawaz Sharif headed towards the podium for his speech, the PM of India was found reading a magazine. Conversely, when PM Modi addressed the SAARC conference, our PM was seen in deep distress, holding his forehead like he was trying to fight a grueling migraine. These are grown, middle-aged men, who were found acting like two juveniles in what we commonly remember in our childhood slang as kutti (not talking) mode. It is pointless to regurgitate the usual blame game of who did what first and the unnecessary exercise of finger pointing. If both these gentlemen were going to act like two brooding juveniles, it would have been wise to stay home and save each other from such embarrassment. Had it been a high school reunion, it would have made no difference. The entire world noticed such childish behaviour in a conference that basically stands for two very significant words: regional cooperation. Just imagine: the two most significant members out of a total of eight are at loggerheads with each other. What cooperation is the region dreaming of? The media at both ends is trying to sell vitriolic narrative as usual. This is very challenging for optimists like me. When I see the barbs fly from both ends, it simply infuriates me. Yes, Modi may be right that these neighbours are geographically closer but these neighbours have to cooperate as well. Knowing full well that most Indian readers will express their views toeing the line of their media, I would still say that the ball is in India’s court. If Modi wants the SAARC countries to cooperate, actions must follow words. It is also safe to say that both countries take centre-stage at any such moot. The world’s press is not so concerned with Nepal, Bhutan or the Maldives, but how these two rather irate neighbours act at any such summit. Rumours are rife that PM Sharif had to retreat from his friendly stance towards India, and the reasons and actors behind such a 180-degree turn are pretty well known. It is very unfortunate that ‘sari diplomacy’ was in vain. The hawkish Mr Modi pulled the plug. I remember playing the snakes and ladders game as a child. It is almost like that game: right at the 95th or 96th square, it seems like a giant python bit everyone and everyone is back at the seventh square. Analysts believe that from a Pakistani perspective, Mr Sharif was taking steps for a very contentious foreign policy into his domain and advancing his ties with India at a rapid pace. The drivers of that domain felt that Mr Sharif was going to give a lot away to the archrival in that quest. Similarly, for Modi, in the wake of elections in the Kashmir Valley, playing goodie goodie with Pakistan was going to be counterproductive. There are possibilities that his party may win and try to repeal the special status of the Valley. What strikes us as odd is that almost a year and a half later, Pakistan still does not have a foreign minister. The foreign advisor, Mr Aziz, is playing that role, at least on the surface. Behind the scenes, perhaps the establishment is acting as the real policy maker. The stated line of the Pakistani side that the Kashmir issue has to be settled first before any real composite dialogue can progress, is a textbook line from a very old and perhaps useless book. To those Indian readers who are perhaps unaware of my views on the Valley, they ought to Google “Kashmir simplified” (Daily Times, February 14, 2013). Most Indian readers would be surprised to know that my opinion resonates with the views of an Indian veteran journalist and diplomat, Mr Kuldip Nayyar. If both countries think that they will be able to achieve something on their stated positions, then both of these countries are seriously mistaken. The resolution of this dispute lies somewhere in the middle. That middle will bring an immediate cessation in hostilities, greater trade, economic cooperation and a boost to the travel industry. What most bright minds on both ends fail to understand is that their stated positions hinder not only their progress, but also the progress of the remaining SAARC nations. Both countries owe it to their future generations that those hostilities, the proxy wars and the tit-for-tat actions must come to an immediate end. A South Asia free of such fear, such enmity and such despair is acceptable to any sane person from these two countries and, for that matter, the rest of the world. The unconditional dialogue process must begin immediately because words are the gateway to a better understanding. The writer is a Pakistani-American mortgage banker. He can be reached at dasghar@aol.com. He tweets at http://twitter.com/dasghar