How many times have you come across the word failure? It is not an uncommon word and familiarity with this word can be seen on the faces of many people these days. What is failure? One fails when one is not recognised for their endeavour because a desirable outcome or goal is not achieved.
Why do we fail? Is it because of an inefficiency on our side? Or it is because of fate? Qurratulain, a religious scholar, is of the opinion that, “As a Muslim, we believe that all are in the hands of Almighty Allah and hence we should always be grateful to His blessings. To achieve any goal, the primary step is to work hard, and then comes prayer and patience.”
Many experience failure differently, however, some common behaviours can be observed in most people. This includes anger, irritation and fear. Anger and irritation stem from frustration. Then there is fear, which results from a person doubting their own capabilities.
“Failure makes one become isolated; the person shows no interest in any work or activity. They may suffer from low self-esteem and motivation, and become too sensitive towards people’s comments. Everything seems to be bleak and gloomy in such a person’s life,” states Sabeen Jawed, a psychologist and a counsellor.
Jawed believes that it takes a lot of effort to overcome failure. Trying to hide one’s mistake or rationalising what went wrong does not help one move forward. Similarly, blaming others for one’s own faults or trying to balance guilt does not work.
It takes a lot of effort to overcome failure. Trying to hide one’s mistake or rationalising what went wrong does not help one move forward. Similarly, blaming others for one’s own faults or trying to balance guilt does not work
So, how can one cope? To start with, one needs to stop blaming others, and acknowledge their own role in the situation. They need to remain calm in the face of trouble. Once one realises their mistake, one should learn from it and try to rectify the situation without being overly critical.
Jawed believes that one needs endurance and patience to deal with failure. Patience doesn’t just help achieve success, it also keeps people grounded and motivated. It is important to face one’s own fear with courage and prepare for any loss.
There are times when you fail despite your hard work. Maria Mustafa, a teacher in Karachi University,always tells her students to take failure as a stepping stone towards success. “Failure is an experience and that’s it! It does not mean that a person is incapable or not talented.It means that their effort lacked one vital ingredient,” she says.
Many extraordinarily successful people have experienced serious failure in life before bouncing back. Such people are a source of inspiration for everyone. For instance, Thomas Edison is on record stating that it took him a 1,000 tries before he was able to make a bulb! J.K. Rowling’s first manuscript for Harry Potter was rejected by 12 publishers before she found success. And Steve Jobs was fired from Apple – a company he himself created – before he returned to take it to the skies.
One fails only when one gives up. There is no clear and definitive path to success. The most successful people are the ones who have experienced major failure multiple times – but what makes them different is that they do not quit.
Failure is just a phase which comes in everyone’s life. It depends on the individual whether they want to dwell on what happened or learn from what went wrong and grow.
The author is a freelance writer and blogger. Her work focuses on health, social issues, technology and lifestyle.
Published in Daily Times, August 11th 2018.