You don’t need to read Midnight’s Children or One Hundred Years of Solitude to unravel magical realism, a branch of fiction where elements of fantasy and reality are blended together. You just need to listen to the conspiracy theories being peddled by our fellow countrymen about current events. Discussion in Pakistan begins with the most trivial of local issues. However, it doesn’t stay confined to Pakistan for long, and soon spills over into international politics, the manoeuvring of powerful countries, the future of China, the present-day policies of Russia, the ‘Great Game,’ and the ‘The New World Order.’ As it further grinds on, a Muslim Ummah begins to take shape, armies of various countries join in, nuclear arsenals move out and about, and a scenario of an impending Third World War emerges. The next few seconds, time will get distorted: past blends in to the present, the present moulds into the future and the future nips the past again. Right then, a premonitory Hadis on Ghazva-e-Hind predicting a battle in which an army of Mujahedeen at the end of times defeats the pagans of India, is introduced. Before moving forward, let me clear up one thing: I do not want to validate or refute the authenticity of this Hadis, a complicated task for a person who does not hold a formal qualification in this field. What I can tell you, though, is that this Hadis has been interpreted and reinterpreted by renowned scholars. Most of them agree that this Hadis does not discuss the current times and definitely does not refer to Pakistan or its military; a secular institution which mirrors the same rules and regulations as the Indian army. In addition, Pakistan’s defence forces have never based its official hierarchy on the system of the Mujahedeen . Had educated, experienced, and eminent Pakistanis — people with worldly knowledge — not believed in these theories, it would not have mattered much. However, even the intelligent adult population in our country is convinced somehow that the whole world is planning to destabilise Pakistan as part of a larger conspiracy against Islam After the disclaimer, let’s come back to the real topic. Did you notice that a quintessential local problem like the electricity shortage or garbage disposal can take you on a world tour? It touches upon the important events of history, peers into the future and leaps back to the same old India-centric security paradigm through a Hadis. Somehow these three words — India, security, and Islam (ISI) – if put together, describe and define Pakistan. Worse yet, this amalgam is brought up in almost every theory, every assessment, every premonition and every discussion through elaborate stories and magical thinking. To explain this phenomenon, I want to tell you a story. A man suffering a mental illness gets fixated on the idea of building a slingshot and hunting down sparrows. Unable to fight the obsession, he is sent to a facility for treatment. After a while, a panel decides to release him. They start by inquiring about his future plans. He says he intends to sell some vegetables and earn money. Following up on that, they question how he proposes to spend the money from the trade. He replies he will purchase the necessary components to build a strong slingshot and hunt down sparrows. The judges get disappointed and send him back to the mental facility again. Few months after aggressive therapy, he gets one more opportunity. This time he looks a lot better. When questioned about his ideas, he presents an impressive business plan in which he starts a company from scratch, and then establishes it in a permanent office. Furthermore, he plans to open branches all over the city. With his explanation, he rouses the judges’ interest, who start looking at the possible potential for rehabilitation and even discuss some release dates. Then one of the members asks how he intends to spend the money. Quite logically, he tells them that he will diversify the business introducing new lines and new items. Digging further the counsellor quizzes about the money from the new lines. The patient gives up saying he will build a factory to make slingshots and hunt down sparrows! The bottom-line: India is our figurative sparrow that we want to hunt down. For that, we invent these complex puzzles using all the mental tools available to us to substantiate a logical and impressive case. To get a reality check, think of Pakistan independent of her conflict with India for a moment. What is left behind? Had the educated, experienced and eminent Pakistanis, people with worldly knowledge, not believed in these theories, it would not have mattered much. However, even our elite has fallen prey to this trap, providing its legitimacy to be discussed in the main stream media instead of being chatted by the people who are in the fringes. The Intelligent adult population is convinced somehow the whole world is planning to destabilise Pakistan as part of a larger conspiracy against Islam. To get a reality check, think of Pakistan independent of their conflict with India for a moment. What is left behind? A third world, over populated country with huge water and environmental crises, an ungovernable state in which even the judges and armed forces follow popularity ratings more than the politicians, a nation that has no impact on international policy making except when it comes to terrorism. Now think hard; why would the world want to conspire against such a country when its people and its institutions are cutting its own roots? Add Kashmir back into the equation and we go back to the previous narrative: conspiracies against Islam, great games swinging back into action and a new world orders springing in to action once again. The writer is a US-based freelance columnist. He tweets at @KaamranHashmi and can be reached at skamranhashmi@gmail.com Published in Daily Times, July 12th 2018.