By Mobeen Arshad,
In most households across Pakistan, a particular rhythm begins with the first light of day. A woman wakes up often before everyone else and the work begins: preparing breakfast, organizing school bags, sweeping floors, folding clothes, managing emotions, and then repeating it all with dinner. This rhythm rarely breaks, and even more rarely is it paused.
What’s most striking is that none of it is formally recognized as “work.”
Across South Asia, millions of women dedicate their lives to maintaining households, raising children, and enabling others to succeed often without breaks, weekends, or appreciation. The Pakistan Bureau of Statistics (2023) reports that women perform over 90% of unpaid care work in the nation, but this effort is overlooked in economic assessments and public discourse.
While it is often framed as a noble choice and indeed, caregiving is one of the most altruistic roles, it is rarely understood as an emotional and psychological burden. For women confined to the same space day and night, lacking intellectual engagement, social mobility, or personal time, the mental health toll is real. Feelings of fatigue, loneliness, and even frustration accumulate silently, often dismissed as part of “what women do.”
Research featured in the Journal of the Pakistan Medical Association (2022) revealed that 42% of full-time homemakers in urban settings experienced symptoms of moderate to severe depression, frequently associated with emotional neglect, insufficient acknowledgment, and social isolation.
This is not to undermine the value of being at home for many, the home is a place of comfort, protection, and meaning. The bond between mother and child is among the most powerful forms of motivation. But motivation cannot replace identity. A woman’s sense of self cannot be sustained solely by self-sacrifice.
The philosopher Simone de Beauvoir, in The Second Sex, warned of reducing women to the roles they play for others mother, wife, caregiver without acknowledging their full personhood. To be always defined in relation to others is to be denied the space to exist for oneself. Similarly, Martha Nussbaum’s Capabilities Approach reminds us that human dignity depends on the opportunity to choose, to grow, and to participate in decisions that shape one’s life. For many homemakers, these choices are still limited.
In traditional settings, the assumption often remains that because a woman does not “earn,” she owes her labour endlessly and silently. But care work is not debt repayment. It is contribution. And contribution without recognition slowly turns into erasure.
The consequences of this neglect extend outward. Children raised by emotionally exhausted caregivers can internalize guilt or become detached. Spouses may misinterpret silence for contentment. Meanwhile, the woman herself begins to feel invisible present in every room, but rarely truly seen.
This is not just a private issue it is a social one. Our cultural framework often reveres mothers in theory while ignoring them in practice. We call it “respect” but rarely offer rest. We talk about “gratitude” but forget empathy.
It is crucial to incorporate these unseen hours into public dialogue. Mental health assessments for homemakers, social engagements, educational environments, and increased shared duties at home can create a significant impact. Crucially, these women should be regarded not just as mothers or wives, but as individuals with thoughts to enrich, skills to showcase, and lives to influence.
Recognizing unpaid labour is not a matter of charity or sympathy it is a matter of justice. If society is built on the foundations, women maintain every day, then those foundations deserve more than passing praise. They deserve voice, visibility, and value.
B.S Philosophy (Punjab University Lahore)