Personal Ordeal

Author: Foqia Sadiq Khan

Today, I want to digress from my usual social science articles for newspapers and want to write about a personal ordeal that concerns law enforcement and access to justice.

I recently had some concerns about the safety of my husband and myself from some very powerful national and international forces. I live in Islamabad. So I approached the nearest police station and they visited our home between the night of 14th and 15th May 2022 I handed in my ten pages written statement about my safety concerns along with two sets of documents. I again visited the nearest police station on 15th May 2022 along with my husband and handed in some more documents to the police along with a new written statement. Today, on 18th May, I again visited the nearest police station and asked them to give me a copy of the FIR based on my ten pages written statement that I had given them between the night of 14th and 15th May. My nearest police station told me to write another short complaint today on 18th May. The police made me wait for four hours and at the end told me verbally and also gave me in writing that the police cannot register FIR against some very powerful national and international forces against whom I have complained and I should go to civil court for recourse. Police also told me today that all my written statements and documents that I have given to police are safe in their record for many more decades to come.

I feel perfectly safe here in our home in Islamabad now that I have handed in all my statements and documents to the police and they are safe in police custody. My husband and I are going to be safe in Islamabad now and for many more decades to come. I see whatsoever no reason for me to approach the civil court and neither would I go to the civil court. I am going to revert to working on social science articles for newspapers in Pakistan from tomorrow. I am perfectly happy writing social science articles and living with the love of my life, my husband, for many more decades to come in Islamabad.

Recently, I have also applied for jobs in many universities in China. Today, I got an email from UniApply China informing me about a position of Research Fellow with expertise in history and politics of West, South and Central Asia regions in the Institute of Middle Eastern Studies, Northwest University of China. I will surely apply for this position at the Chinese University. If I get a job at a University in China; I will only go to China if my husband comes with me to China. I cannot live without my husband either in Pakistan or China as I am almost handicapped. I am extremely dependent on my husband for love, sustenance, support, intellectual and scholarly exchanges, and my life. I owe my life to my husband a billion times. My husband is my oxygen and my lifeline. My husband has been protecting my life and has been the source of immense happiness since 1998. There is no relative, no friend, no one in this world who is sincere to me other than my husband. I look forward to growing old with my husband for many more decades to come either in Pakistan or China.

As I wrote in my two Daily Times articles on 2 April 2021 and 20 April 2022, I do not trust either my maternal or paternal relatives at all. I have not visited my relatives in Taxila and its surrounding areas for decades. All my relatives are blocked on my phone. I have not called my relatives even on Eid. I will never call my relatives on Eids or otherwise for the rest of my life. I will never ever visit my relatives in Taxila and its surrounding areas for the rest of my life. My relatives can harm and kill me on the behalf of the very powerful national and international forces; therefore I do not trust my relatives at all and I will never ever call or visit them for the rest of my life.

Today, I used Metro Cab in emergency after many years since I have permanently blocked Careem and Uber some months ago. However, I am never ever going to use a Metro cab to go anywhere outside of Islamabad ever. I will never ever leave my husband’s and mine home in Islamabad to live anywhere else in Pakistan. If I am found missing from our home and taken to my relatives’ place in Taxila and its surrounding areas and killed there; it means the very powerful national and international forces have kidnapped me and taken me to my relatives’ place and had my relatives kill me there as my relatives are manipulated, and these national and international powerful forces are responsible for my murder. However, now that I have handed in my written statements and documents to the police, I feel perfectly safe in our home in Islamabad since I have gone public. I am sure, my husband and I will remain safe in our home in Islamabad now and for many more decades to come.

I will revert back to working on my social science articles for Pakistani newspapers from tomorrow. I will also apply for the job in the Chinese university from tomorrow onwards about which I got an email today. I look forward to growing old with my husband, who is my lifeline and my oxygen, for many more decades to come either in Pakistan or China by being gainfully productive in social science issues.

The writer is an Islamabad-based social scientist. She can be reached at fskcolumns@gmail.com.

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