A for absurdity

Author: D Asghar

If the words associated with the English alphabet were revised in my land of birth, Pakistan, then A will no longer stand for ‘apple’; it would probably definitely be by ‘absurdity’. You may ask why that is. Well, if you go by the recent request by the ‘torchbearers’ of our faith, the Jamaat-e-Islami (JI), to grant pardon to the killer of the former governor, Salmaan Taseer, you would perhaps agree. To add insult to injury, the plea has been made to President Asif Zardari, all in the name of the public interest. I am looking at the proverbial wall to bang my head as usual. Even the worst of the worst, in simple logic, would be scratching their heads and saying where in God’s name a self-confessed killer, a brutal murderer, should be pardoned in the name of the public interest.

The usual tacit accusation is hurled against the late governor that since he ‘blasphemed’, hence he deserved to die in such a horrific manner. It leaves you absolutely speechless because the electronic media was behind building such a malicious narrative against that brave soul and the nation’s cowardice towards his brutal murder was equally appalling and pathetic. The victim was portrayed as the perpetrator and the villain as a hero. May I remind the real torchbearers of our beloved faith that an unprovoked murder is considered a ‘major sin’ in the faith that we claim to follow? The prescribed punishment is life for life, barring the only exception when the family members of the victim accept monetary compensation. To the best of my knowledge, the Taseer family has not shown any interest in any ‘Diyat’. But there is significant reverence and following of the murderer, as the religio-political parties have made him the poster child for their capricious agenda. All in all, it is absurd with a capital A, one with a tiny bit of intelligence may say, but I digress.

If you watched the former self-made president, General Pervez Musharraf, sparring with an Indian TV anchor on the recent escalation of tensions at the Line of Control (LOC) between India and Pakistan, you will agree that A will definitely become the symbol for absurdity. You may ask again why that is so. According to many of my fellow hyper and emotionally charged fellow countrymen, he performed like a soldier firing verbal cannon balls. I was invited to a get-together where many of my friends were singing endless praises of the former commando. I had not seen the much talked about show at that point, so I refrained from any comment. But after watching the show, my stance remains even stronger about the out-of-touch-with-reality former general.

General Musharraf was invited to express his comments on the issue at hand, and he defended the actions by offering a complete denial, and at the same time, admitted on record that he was unaware of any facts surrounding the entire episode. Now, this is a former general, the architect of the failed misadventure of Kargil, demonstrating his ignorance about facts surrounding the escalation of recent tensions between the two countries. Mind you, he is a former general and a former president of Pakistan, not to mention the leader of a political party, dreaming of returning to Pakistan for another attempt to gain power.

In the same vein, Musharraf admitted that he was on record as stating that certain banned organisations in India, such as Lashkar-e-Tayyaba and Jamat-ud-Dawa, enjoy popular public support in Pakistan. That is where his voice somehow lost steam and lowered automatically. When grilled by the rather pushy and loud anchor, he retorted by raising his voice repeatedly, which was followed by the usual obfuscation. The anchor tried to take him to the failed operation of Kargil and the ex-general refused to answer by stating that it was not the topic of discussion. He dodged the pointed question of another mutilated Indian soldier, Captain Saurav Kalia, from the Kargil episode by the usual denial. This brings me back to the absurdity of the matter. Sir, as much as many Pakistanis would cheer you for your absurdity, this one just made me dumbfounded. Oh no, I was not expecting the debacle of East Pakistan as a zinger from the former commando, but that solidified my firm belief of the status of the first letter of the English alphabet A back home. His befitting response was that he laid the blame on RAW for the division of Pakistan in 1971. I tolerated the entire half an hour worth of interview, but needed to pop a couple of aspirin pills after witnessing that great showdown to calm my throbbing nerves.

While we are on the subject of videos, another link was forwarded to me by a veteran columnist. This is an amateur video of approximately 10 minutes, which may not only change the letter A but perhaps the fate of the letter C as well. If you recall, we were taught C is for ‘cat’. But after witnessing 10 minutes of the gruesome footage, one can easily say that C stands for ‘cruelty’ in the land of the pure. Why, you may ask again. This video has uniformed men beating unarmed and downtrodden civilians with belts, hands and boots. Though it appears to be some form of interrogation, but even with the poor audio quality, you can still follow the barrage of abuses. Some of the victims are elderly and ruthlessly beaten, their screams and cries for M, which should really stand for ‘mercy’.

These people do not appear to be militants and one can make out their pleas and cries in Urdu and Pashto. Perhaps the former general, who vehemently and vociferously denies on the idiot box any inhumane acts of men in uniform, needs to give this video a quick look to perhaps change his M for mind. In the dynamic world of altering lexicons back home, one thing will remain unscathed, and that is D for denial.

The writer is a Pakistani-American mortgage banker. He blogs at http://dasghar.blogspot.com and can be reached at dasghar@aol.com He tweets at http://twitter.com/dasghar

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