A promise is a promise

Author: Hina Hafeezullah Ishaq

“There is one universal truth, applicable to all countries, cultures and communities: violence against women is never acceptable, never excusable, never tolerable,” says the UN’s Secretary General Ban Ki-moon.

Today is International Women’s Day and the UN’s theme for this year is: “A promise is a promise: Time for action to end violence against women.” The campaign UNITE has been launched, which “calls on all governments, civil society, women’s organisations, men, young people, the private sector, the media and the entire UN system to join forces in addressing this global pandemic.” As per the data available on the UN website, “Worldwide: up to 50 percent of sexual assaults are committed against girls under the age of 16; globally, 603 million women live in countries where domestic violence is not yet considered a crime; up to 70 percent of women in the world report having experienced physical and/or sexual violence at some point in their lifetime and over 60 million girls worldwide are child brides, married before the age of 18.” Women are estimated to constitute over three billion of the world’s population.

Domestic violence is a huge but often ignored issue in Pakistan. Unlike its neighbours, Bangladesh and India, Pakistan has miserably failed to legislate a specific law that addresses this, though a few provisions of assault, hurt, wrongful confinement in the Pakistan Penal Code are triable in the Family Courts since 2002. In February 2012, the Senate passed the Domestic Violence (Prevention and Protection) Bill 2012, which at the time was termed by Senator Nilofar Bakhtiar as a ‘role-model’ for the provinces to follow. Unfortunately, for the women of Islamabad and the rest of Pakistan, the bill is probably gathering cobwebs in the National Assembly. After the passing of the Constitutional 18th Amendment, it fell upon the provinces to legislate for domestic violence. Not a single province has managed to do that but there has been no dearth of empty promises.

‘X’ was a victim of violence. She had been divorced once before and was married off to a man 25 years her senior. She was beaten habitually by her in-laws, and one day, her sister-in-law and her two grown sons brutally assaulted her, which resulted in serious injuries including a head wound caused by a pair of pliers. They then snatched her keys and took her jewellery, other personal belongings and property and turned her out, in the blood-covered clothes that she was wearing at the time. Bleeding heavily, X went to the police station, where a report was written, which she was asked to sign and thumb mark. The police took her to the hospital for treatment; the wound required 15 stitches, and a Medico-Legal Certificate was issued. The next day when she went to inquire about the case, the police told her that there was no record of her complaint and she should settle the matter with her in-laws.

‘Y’ was given up for adoption by her real father when her mother died; she was just six months old. Mercifully, she was brought up by a loving couple, but unfortunately, her adoptive mother also passed away when she was 15 years old. Her adoptive father married her to his nephew and gifted the house to her; she rented out the lower portion. After her father’s death, her husband started to emotionally and physically abuse her; he tore up the gift deed and sold her moveable property, including her sewing machine, which was the sole source of her earnings after the rent, which was regularly usurped by the husband. With no one to support her and no parents, she still lives and suffers severe abuse in her own house.

‘Z’ belonged to a well-placed family, and unfortunately, got married to a man who was greedy, suffered from extreme low self-esteem and a huge inferiority complex. She lived in a joint family system and was the recipient of massive verbal abuse, meted out regularly and publicly. As the years passed things got worse, and she was taunted and abused for not being able to bear a male child; her two young daughters were never accepted. One day, when her children were extremely ill, Z’s husband brutally assaulted her — in front of them — slapping, punching and banging her head repeatedly into their toy shelf, with her hair held in a death grip; the children’s nanny tried to intervene but got assaulted too. That day Z found the courage to end the abuse.

Domestic violence should ideally mean all acts of gender-based or other physical, sexual, economic, verbal and emotional abuse, committed by an accused against any woman, child or other vulnerable person with whom the accused is or has been in a family relationship including but not limited to: assault; criminal force; criminal intimidation; hurt; mischief; stalking; wrongful confinement; wrongful restraint; entry into aggrieved person’s residence without his or her consent — where the parties do not share the same residence; and/or any other repressive, cruel or abusive behaviour towards the victim where such a conduct harms or may cause imminent danger or harm to her safety, dignity, health or well-being. An ideal law for violence should aim to institutionalise measures and special provisions that prevent, protect, compensate and rehabilitate women, children and other vulnerable persons who are victims of violence including but not limited to honour crimes, acid and burn attacks, bride burning, dowry abuse, exploitation and domestic violence.

XYZ are not the only ones who have suffered domestic abuse; there are millions of XYZs and 603 million in countries in which this is not an offence. What women like XYZ need are comprehensive domestic violence laws that provide: protection orders, which prohibit the accused from harassing the victim and prevent him from entering her house or causing violence to her family or dependants; to restrain him from coming near her so that she can live in relative safety; residence orders, so that women cannot be turned out of their homes, whether owned or rented and compensation orders, which bind the accused to pay monetary relief to meet the expenses incurred and losses suffered by the victim including loss of earning, medical expense, the loss caused due to the destruction, damage or removal of any property from the control of the aggrieved person; and maintenance for the victim as well as her children. The law should have special measures for evidence, which allow the victims to be able to testify without being scared or without coming face-to-face with the perpetrator; a law which mandates that it should be the responsibility of the government to appropriately rehabilitate the victim and her dependents and to provide medical services, employment, education, housing and other welfare measures taking into account the specific needs of each. Helplines, shelter homes, police-free remedies, community involvement, awareness and swift and speedy redress without fear of retaliation is the need of the day.

Why then, as a society, are we scared of protecting women against violence? Why is it so hard for us to acknowledge domestic violence as a serious matter requiring immediate action? Why do we, shamelessly, use religion as a garb to promote violence against women? Why don’t we unite against this pandemic that destroys our humanity? Why do we accept, excuse and tolerate people who abuse our women?

Z’s husband when reminded of his failed commitments and undertakings was extremely fond of saying: “Promises are like snowballs, easy to make, hard to keep.” Time to see whether Pakistan made a snowball.

The writer is an advocate of the High Court

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