Daily Times

Dear Mathira & Rose,

I need your sincere guidance please. My husband went abroad after three months of marriage and after reaching there, divorced me on the phone. He had an extra marital affair and got married to his girlfriend. He took Rs 30 lacs from my parents as my parents did not give me much dowry because I had to settle abroad. His family is denying everything. It’s a fraudulent case. My parents are too old and ill. My friends, cousins and other elders of my family are advising me to lodge a complaint that he’s a fraud and his family is involved with him in all this. Should I approach some human rights organisation or some NGOs or any institutions which can help me or should I let the matter rest in the court of Allah? Please advise.

Regards,

Fraud Case

Mathira’s Advice:

First of all, get yourself in control. This is really going to be a tough thing. Getting money out of someone is the worst thing and sometimes impossible. Even if you’re not able to get your money back, at least give him a scare and that can only happen with a legal notice. If your parents gave him Rs 30 lacs, then you should actually file a case against him over here for fraud and also his family for being involved. You need to carry on and being strong right now is the only option. Your money might not come back but ensure he cries 30 lac tears. Trust me, this money will run out but Allah always settles the scores. This is a fact and I’ve seen it. He was bad news but your parents blindly trusted him. You just don’t give Rs 30 lacs away like that. Every girl should know that if a guy wants to accept you, they shouldn’t take you away from your parents as a burden. Parents need to realise this too. I was born and raised abroad so I know that in the west, parents gift their daughter with security, so that in case, the marriage breaks, the girl has a little to fall back on. If a girl is madly in love and wants to get married, there’s no harm in doing that, but please don’t force your parents to empty their accounts, sell their house or take debts just to get you married.

If you want sisterly advice on any issue, DM me @real_mathira

Rose’s Advice:

I think this man is a true face of fraud because of his intention of marrying somebody’s daughter who were as naïve as your parents were. That’s why it’s important to always run a background check before marrying your daughter off. Our culture is such that whenever a proposal comes for a girl in which the guy is settled abroad, the parents since they want a good future for their daughter, happily accept. In your case, your parents were even happy in giving money away to your husband so he could run his business smoothly. Monsters like these go around preying on such naïve families. You and your parents are victims of this fraud monster. You should file a complaint against him. You should go vocal with this on social media so that if he’s scamming women abroad as well, they should get to know about him. I don’t know whether a criminal can be taken into account if he flees abroad but you should play your part at least so you don’t have any regrets. Get a good lawyer. If his family is involved, that means it was all a game. They just wanted money out of you and your family. Put it out there. Let other women know. Post on Instagram and Facebook about how big a fraud he is. His intention was always to take money and flee. If he had a little bit of decency, he would never have done that. He just used you like an ATM.

If you want sisterly advice on any issue, DM me @rosemohammed777