Daily Times

Why everyone is cursing senator Nehal Hashmi? He did exactly what one expects from an unctuous bootlicker. By threatening judiciary and the joint investigation team (JIT) probing the Panama Papers case; by swearing before the Supreme Court that he was threatening nobody but Banigala; by resigning from Senate and withdrawing the resignation, he just displayed the obsequiousness and opportunism toadies are known for. He proved that he can droop to the lowest level of servility to please his masters and when it comes to summersaults, he can outperform even monkeys! If Nawaz was wise and creative, he would have carved out a ‘Nawaz Praise Prize’ a la Nobel Peace Prize to reward Nehal instead of expelling him from the party.

Nehal’s loathsome servility brings to mind a couple of classic lackeys — for instance Ejazul Haq. In the 90s, Sheikh Rashid used to be a blue-eyed boy of Nawaz. To please him, he would make utterly gross comments about the late Benazir Bhutto in and outside the parliament. (Before Sheikh’s nauseating words in days of yore, Khwaja Asif’s tweets like tractor trolley or dumper against the female parliamentarians sound decent and sophisticated!)

PPP was in power so it decided to teach Sheikh a lesson. Police miraculously recovered an unlicensed Kalashnikov from Sheikh’s mansion and he was dispatched to the Bahawalpur Jail to serve a 7-year rigorous sentence. To please both Nawaz and Sheikh, Ejazul Haq addressed a public gathering in Rawalpindi holding a Kalashnikov in one hand challenging the government to arrest him if it had enough guts. When police arrested him he took a summersault saying: ‘It was a toy Kalashnikov!’

Another lackey was also a senator, not of Nawaz but the Roman emperor Gaius Caligula! Caligula was ill and this senator in a bid to prove himself more loyal than the king raised his hands and said: ‘I would offer my life if Jupiter would spare our beloved emperor!’ Caligula, who referred to himself as a God and Jupiter, opened his eyes and said: ‘Jupiter accepts your offer!’ and ordered his army chief to execute him. (Visionaries handle lackeys like this!)

Nawaz has a track record of falling afoul of the Army and the judiciary. He can’t stop himself from picking a fight with the two institutions and resorting to disruptive antics

Z A Bhutto’s lackeys would keep stating that if their leader was hanged, the streets of Pakistan will be flooded with their blood. None of them wanted even a scratch on body. They tried to please Bhutto and his family by engaging the services of a sweeper who was directed to fake a public immolation. He was assured that nothing will happen to him. He will be rescued as he would light himself. The poor man was never rescued. The fire eventually engulfed him and Bhutto was hanged amidst pindrop silence across the country!

Nehal is just a reincarnation of that hapless sweeper. He is a lawyer and can’t be so dim-witted to threaten the Supreme Court on his own. He could have discreetly practiced the axiom (more loyal than the king) by taking a leaf out Attaul Haq Qasmi, Tariq Fatemi or Irfan Siddiqui’s book. So, it can’t be his personal opinion.

Nawaz has a track record of falling afoul of the army and the judiciary. He can’t stop himself from picking a fight with the two institutions and resorting to disruptive antics to make them act like his toadies. In 1997, hundreds of his toadies attacked the Supreme Court. This is not possible in 2017 but a small fry like Gullu Butt or Nehal can always be used.

Whether Nehal’s opera was composed or spontaneous, Nawaz has once again shot himself in the foot. His dream of becoming the prime minister fourth time does not seem to be coming true. Public opinion is no more in his favour. He has been likened to the Corleone family and the Sicilian Mafia by the Supreme Court. The Corleone family was like the Roman Empire and as such was helpless before its downfall. Nawaz is no exception too. When he would be shaking hand with his end, his sycophants would be wagging their tails to hail the new master. We witnessed this spectacle in 1999. He was ousted by General Musharraf. All his crawlers served Musharraf’s court while he was in exile. All of them were back to dance to his tunes when Musharraf embraced his end!

The writer is a freelance journalist and researcher based in Islamabad. Email: Yamankalyan@gmail.com