Why Pakistani mothers yearn to have a male child?

Author: Sultana Ali Kori

“I am a mother of 10 daughters, but my husband desires for a son,” said Aisha, 36-year-old house maker, of Tando Allahyar, in August 2019. Ayesha was married at the age of 17. After two years of marriage, she gave birth to her first baby girl, but her happiness was short-lived as her infant daughter died after six months due to high fever. One and a half year later, Aisha was again blessed with another daughter. At present, she has 10 daughters. “I never used any contraceptive methods as we wanted to have a son. Now, my husband is threatening me that he will marry another woman so that he can have a son.”

As per Thomson Reuters Foundation (2018) survey results, India topped as the most dangerous country for women in terms of healthcare, discrimination, sexual violence and cultural traditions, followed by war-torn Afghanistan, Syria, Somalia and Saudi Arabia. Pakistan was ranked sixth on the list.

During the field investigation in rural settings as part of the Sindh Union Council and Community Economic Strengthening Support (SUCCESS) Programme, it was divulged that a majority of impoverished families prefer a male child, who would grow up to be a productive member to the family and help the parents financially in old age. And these families keep on having children until they get a son. This culture has constrained the uptake of contraceptives and increased the family size in rural areas.

As per Pakistan Bureau of Statistics, the country has a low (35.4) contraceptive prevalence rate (CPR) as compared to other South Asian countries such as Bhutan (65.6), Bangladesh (62), Sri Lanka (61), and India (53.5). Pakistan’s CPR rate is only better than Afghanistan (22.5) and Maldives (34.7). Believing that the son is the legitimate inheritor of the household, a woman continues childbearing till the birth of a son.

According to the Global Gender Gap Index report 2020, Syria, Pakistan, Iraq and Yemen are indicated as worst-performers in the world, with the lowest managerial positions for women

Aisha is also facing the same situation as she fears for her marriage. Her daughters lack modern amenities, e.g. education, and their basic needs go unfulfilled. Aisha sighed with a heavy heart and said, “People laugh at us for having so many daughters and no son, especially my relatives, who do not see that this as a twist of fate.”

Aisha is not alone in facing the issue although it is wide-raging in low economic countries. While the preference for a son is global phenomenon, it can more intensively be observed in South Asian countries. In a patriarchal society, women are under intense pressure to give birth to sons to satisfy their husbands and consolidate their marriages. In India, due to patriarchal culture preferences for a son stem form economic considerations and cultural norms. In Pakistan, preference for boys over girls is stronger in rural areas and it is culturally embedded due to a variety of reasons. A son is preferred because of his productive role in the household economy, as his remuneration is more than that of a girl; he is the inheritor of household assets, including land; a son carries the family’s name, and he is considered to be a source of support and protection for parents in their old age. On the other hand, girls are considered a burden, who will leave the household upon marriage. This is one of the major reasons for the lack of investment in building girls’ human capital.

From January 2017 to April 2018, the Edhi Foundation and the CHHIPA Welfare Organisation have found 355 cases of fetuses dumped in the garbage with Karachi having such 180 cases. Over 98% of the dumped babies were girls.

In the search of the desired number of sons, couples stay away from contraceptive methods and shorten birth intervals which have increased Pakistan’s population growth rate. Additionally, Pakistan is also far behind neighbouring Muslim-majority countries such as Bangladesh, Iran and Tajikistan to achieve the Sustainable Development Goal 3 and 5 to improve maternal mortality and child mortality. Pakistan is considered the second-worst country to reduce the deaths of children under the age of five. Apart from it, the country has made far slower progress in reducing maternal mortality than other developing countries in South and Central Asia.

According to the Global Gender Gap Index report 2020, Syria, Pakistan, Iraq and Yemen are indicated as worst-performers in the world, with the lowest managerial positions for women. Pakistan is the third-worst country in the world in terms of gender parity, ranking 151 out of 153 countries. It ranked 150th in terms of economic participation, 143 in education and 149 in health and survival.

Pakistan’s National Human Development Report and Human Development Index report 2017 indicates that in gender equality the districts of Sindh are the worst-performing. It is a societal created norm that families grow with a son and not with a daughter. Policymakers should develop policies to promote gender equality in Pakistan. For example, women constitute only 5.48% of the federal government employees. More investments are needed for girls and women to build their human capital so that they can play a more active role in their families, communities and the country. Only by having more girls in higher education and women in employment can the mindset of people embedded by the patriarchal values begin to be challenged.

Sultana Ali Kori is a sociologist and working as Field Researcher at Rural Support Programmes Network. She can be reached at sultana.kori@rspn.org.pk

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