Death of a teacher and the question of parenthood

Author: Altaf Ullah Khan

The untimely death of a young teacher in Lahore has shaken me personally. He was young, looking for a future, had a family, and indeed a great asset for the academia. While I mourn his death I think about the student who levelled these false allegations. Who is she?! It is not about her name and address, or how she looks like. It is about the identity of the youth who recklessly abuse their right to be young. It is not about gender either. Boys have other tricks to get through their exams and ensure high grades. Blackmailing and tarnishing the image of the person who doesn’t comply to their demands is common. No one feels any qualms of conscience while committing such crimes against humanity.

The next thought that comes to my mind is regarding the parents who raise such kids. Do they consciously instill this lack of respect for humanity among their beloved children? I don’t think so. Everyone is preaching goodness and lamenting the bad world. So, where does it come from? From the society we are in, maybe. But what is a society but a conglomeration of individuals and groups? That’s it! So, it is a large number of men and women who don’t know how to raise good kids. These are people who don’t know anything about parenthood. If we have a large number of these among us, we are doomed to have a dysfunctional society. I think we are already there.

Where to go from here? This is the question banging on the walls of my mind since I have heard this news. Not that I wasn’t concerned about it earlier, but this is the trigger. It’s just the last straw to break the back of the proverbial camel. The looming sense of insecurity in our society has given rise to two of the deadliest sins of human existence: insecurity and narcissism. Driven by these twin demons we wish to earn more and more and fill our fathomless bellies with all that comes. No one thinks about right and wrong anymore, unless it is about the other. And each and every other is a belligerent one. We have developed a panopticon of hate, where each and everyone is sitting in the high castle of judgment, throwing decrees in the face of the other.

Our children have internalized this inhumanity without us saying a word. Remember! Our children learn not what we say, but what we think. Preaching won’t do, unless we decide to cleanse our hearts and souls of the weeds of inhumanity, sitting deep in the darkest recesses of our minds. This is not an easy resolve to make. It needs unlearning the lessons we have crafted so intensely to hide the hideousness of our existence. An existence whose outer is being gleaned by sweet talk and designer clothes, while annihilating the very core values of humanity among us.

It is a downward spiral and we are deep into the pit. It might be too late to rehumanize ourselves as parents. We have already groomed a generation of mental midgets, who look human only by appearance. But it might not be all lost for these young men and women.

They can decide to rethink and unlearn our experimental parenthood and graft a life of their own. There is a lot to be done and the onus is upon the youth. The death of the young teacher is in fact the death of a youth that doesn’t know its self.

The writer is the professor of Mass Communication, Forman Christian College University, Lahore

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