Daily Times

The unpaid domestic work is the other chapter of all these women’s life who ironically suffer from the same system yet stay opponents in their roles. Unpaid domestic work forms a 20 trillion-dollar industry, asestimated by Oxfamin their recent statistics.Whether one is directly manually working or supervising the domestic work, any position or work is hardly acknowledged or validated for a woman. She will always be regarded as a beneficiary of the perks provided by her husband/father. That trophy ultimately belongs to him, so whether you can cook a feast or can cater to everyone’s needs like a good house keeper, a good driver for all errands or the best dish washer on earth, better learn to express your gratitude for the basic needs money you get, as you are just a mere beneficiary.

So,a woman is barely a tenant of a place, where she needs to keep on working for a happy survival,as no ownership ever belonged to her.It will be a home to his parents but not hers.Unfortunately,unpaid domestic women, upon being asked the question regarding the nature of jobstates,”I’mjust a house wife I don’t do anything”. It is indeed a strange system that’s worse than capitalism.Even in capitalism, Adam Smith mentioned that there are few ultimate benefits, as the capitalist will eventually throw his excess share of capital in market, that will generate profit for working class, but patriarchy is one system that never shares the profit of excessive power, rather it creates aristocracy of labour among their female subordinates. It keeps on reaping the benefits with the tool of conformism and in the total absence of freedom of choice for women. If by chance,women try to question the system, the very first confrontation begins with the custodians of the patriarchy.

If a woman complains about a wounded head or bruises, at least some sympathy is shown but the injuries of emotional abuse remain invalidated

What urges a woman to raise and stand againstpatriarchy, the mere curbing of her rights, the suffocation and the abuse?Luckily,there has been acknowledgement of physical abuse and now there is at least a law against physical abuse of women, but what about emotional?

If a woman complains abouta wounded head or bruises, at least some sympathy is shown but the injuries of emotional abuse remain invalidated. Whenself-esteem, dignity and boundaries are useless terms, when awoman’s character is the easiest of all targets, her self-esteem is vulnerable for sabotage and her morality is criticisedby the so-calledgods of her life, will she ever be heard?

Sexual abuse is always hidden under the carpet, at times this criminal silence encourages the abuser to keep on doing it but our dignity fears to confront as masculinity prevails over the silence of femininity.

All these problems faced by women hindering their personal growth is called glass ceiling, which eventually stops their growth in an invisible manner. But to a woman none of these issues seem to create a glass ceiling, rather these all are tight ropes around her neck, she keeps on struggling to loosen it up for mere breathing. Those people who found the women’s day march banners and slogans weird, do not realise that these are just the answers to the weirdest questions and impositions put on female fraternity by our system.So, it leads to animagination that how disgusting and weird these impositions actually are. As the women demanded nothing but the undoing of these hideous stereotypes. Hence, women’s day needs to be extended intowomen’s decade.

A decade where the freedom of choice will be a right not a grant, A decade when a mother teaches daughter to dream,A decade where she does not cling to a man for survival rather the bonding has to be based on love, a decade where a woman be the symbol of strength and endurance rather the victim.

The best we can do is to leave it as a legacy for our girls and boys so that they live in a gender balanced world where relationships, positions and roles are not ascribed rather they are an achievement.

The writer is a sociologist and child rights activist who teaches at the University of Punjab

Published in Daily Times, March 17^th 2019.