Daily Times

I came to know about the “parental leave” when former British Prime Minister David Cameron availed it upon the birth of his youngest child while he was the prime minister. I told myself isn’t it so good that the British law respects the sentiments of the father as well whilst taking care of the emotions and wellbeing of the mother? Indeed, in child birth mothers go through the unimaginable emotional and physical stress; this is why every religion and philosophy of life pays so much respect to the mothers. However, assuming that fathers don’t feel a thing when they become a father is just absurd. In our society where mostly fathers are responsible for all the bills, the laws in employment in academia and industry alike don’t recognize their emotional wellbeing as much as they consider it for the spouses and the female employees.

In the same vein, laws in the family courts too favor mothers over fathers when deciding the divorces and separation cases. Children are often given to the mothers as if fathers don’t feel the same love for the children as mothers do. These are the biases that are prevalent in our society and other third world countries. Whereas in developed countries both father and mother are considered parents and their rights are protected in the matters of leaves on full pay and the right of custody of the minors. Apart from the absence of laws for paternity leave, another hurdle is the culture. The employees coming from rural background, born to illiterate parents or having a typical mindset are quick to poke fun at those male employees that feel for their spouses and/or children. A leave in the name of accompanying an ailing wife or a child is considered a less-manly act. I wonder such men only take pride in conquering women and teaches the same to their sons.

There are quite a few examples of parental leave rights for men in other countries. Spain, Singapore, United Kingdom, and USA are just a few names to quote.  In the USA, upto 12 weeks of paid leave is allowed to new fathers. Apart from enjoying some time with the new born, the paternity leave is useful also to ensure that the fathers catch up on their sleep which is obviously badly affected post-child birth. Fathers have to rush the child as well as spouses to the hospitals and take care of their immediate needs. This all is too stressful which off course our organizations such as academia considers not eligible for recognition – after all father is a men and how can he complain. Anyone remember those Bacchan’s words “mardkokabhidardnahehota!”

What is even more surprising is that no women organizations raise this issue. If a man of the family fell sick, meets an accident or become insane due to heavy stress, a woman and her children will suffer too. This simple remark should encourage women to join in and raise the equal leave rights for the fathers after the child birth. Ex-President Barack Obama once said “family leave and childcare these aren’t frills. They’re basic needs. They shouldn’t be bonuses – they should be the bottom line.” Even if our academia and industry start giving parental leave as a bonus they will find the benefit of it later.

An Israeli research shows that the parental leave fathers take for their young children, makes them more mature, responsible and a better person. Similarly two Columbia University Social Work professors opine that fathers who take leave for new born babies take good care for them whilst they are growing up and thus give society better work force and better humans. As for the women support groups, I want to quote the example of Sweden, where a research has shown that where fathers take two months mandatory off before the child’s 8 birth date, mothers’ incomes increase many times for those leave months.

The writer is an assistant professor at FUUAST, Karachi.