Daily Times

The envelope lies patiently across the keyboard. You shove into the laptop bag and get on with the day.  Later, while pulling out the laptop, there it is again. Why so much trepidation for just looking at the paycheck? Chances are the numbers on there are severely displeasing. You were not supposed to be “here”. There are fewer zeros on there then you deserve. The frustration of losing the promotion hits again. You work so hard. Then again, so does everyone else in the office. You do not want their slice of the pie, but is it so horrible to want yours to be a larger one? You intellectually understand the mechanics behind the number. The recession is in full swing, so it impacts the company as well. This is a cycle that occurs like clockwork; the shame, resentment and anxiety all flaring up – all due to rectangular slip of paper.

I wish this dance with distress, as the paycheck lands on the desk, was a foreign phenomenon. Being a worker-bee myself, I have battled a massive drop in self-worth on many such days.

Are you a lesser person if your pay has been docked? No! Does earning less than your friends mean you are lesser than them? No! Has your social mobility been linked to your title/role at work and by extension, your take-home pay? Probably, but what do people know, anyway.

There are a few reasons to explain what you earn. Where you are parked, financially, can be because:you chose to take a leap into the unknown, following your passion over a “practical” career; the profession you are in is traditionally less compensated due to messed-up societal priorities;you moved to a new city, are waiting on the headhunters and you applied to all the jobs in the classifieds;you cut your hours so you could parent your child/parents/plants/puppies; or lastly, wages are going down in the industry.

We keep equating our self-worth with our salaries, and this needs to stop. This is a toxic thought-loop and is in no way substantiated by anything real. The fact that your effort results in task-completion and cashable compensation is worth taking pride in.

Money in your bank account can affect your ability to spend on entertainment. It can be limiting and scary when we have dependents.

Acknowledging all of that, how can your paycheck determine your self-worth? Money can only solve so much of our problems. The challenge is the social messaging that equates plump bank accounts with success and lean bank accounts with failure.

Conduct an informal survey of friends and family who have substantial take-home pay. Ask them how they feel about the work they do. According to a recent report in the World Economic Forum, more than 30 percent of the Brits polled found their jobs pointless. True contentment has little to do with the nature of our employment. For the most of us, our jobs are not beacons of light leading us to ultimate bliss and self-fulfillment. They are a means to an end. Some of us may have a day-job, a side-gig or a business that is completely in sync with our passions, values and a sense of purpose. For the rest of us, it may be an employment situation with insurance benefits, good lighting, tolerable coworkers and a functional toilet.

It is time to detach your sense of success and self-worth from the monthly take-home income. Sometimes a job is just a job. In this economy that alone is a massive accomplishment. Cash the check. You’re good.

The writer is a corporate trainer with a passion for women’s empowerment, technology and smart money management. She tweets @marsonearth and writes at http://www.moneytalkforasianwomen.com