Daily Times

Bojo the Foreign Secretary has dropped the mother of all ‘gaffes’. And this time, his carefully manufactured image of harmless toff-about-town complete with floppy hair just won’t do. After all, Britain had long ago given that role to a certain Hugh Grant. And even he appears to have gone for the chop.

Nevertheless, it appears that the memo must have lost its way in the Christmas post. For how else to explain why it took Boris Johnson a whole 12 days to apologise for his comments that may see a British-Iranian woman spend an additional five years in jail; somewhere she reportedly shouldn’t be in the first place.

Nazanin Zaghari-Ratcliffe was imprisoned by the Iranian authorities back in April of last year, when she was in Tehran to visit her parents. She had been sentenced to a five-year-custodial term over charges of spying and trying to overthrow the regime. And then came along BoJo, a man known for clowning around when it comes to walking the verbal tightrope. Ms Zaghari- Ratcliffe was minding her own business while teaching the Iranians a thing or two about journalism. At least that was how the bumbling and inept diplomat put it. Meaning that the man who is Foreign Secretary, the man who is tasked with representing Britain on the international stage — couldn’t quite muster the gumption to read his own country’s briefing on Iran. And would you Adam n’ Eve it. Just like that, as if by magic, Ms Zaghari-Ratcliffe was hauled once more before the Iranian courts to face additional charges. For the authorities chose to take BoJo’s comments as the truth; as a confession by proxy.

It is in the interests of certain quarters to spin Ms Zaghari-Ratcliffe’s plight to the hilt. Meaning very much to the advantage of the British government. Especially in light of the supposed multi-million-pound shopping list that the Iranians seemingly want delivered in exchange for her release

Most of the British media as well as the political establishment seem to have rallied behind the idea of letting Boris get on his bike and push off into the post-Brexit sunset. Though certain parliamentarians have tacked on a qualifier: if Ms Zaghari-Ratcliffe’s time behind bars is extended. After all, it is in the interests of certain quarters to spin her plight to the hilt. Meaning very much to the advantage of the British government. Especially in light of the supposed multi-million-pound shopping list that the Iranians seemingly want delivered in exchange for the release of the 38-year-old dual British-Iranian national. These include allowing the Iranian embassy to circumvent American sanctions and open a bank account in London. And then there is the not so small question of having Britain abide by the International Chamber of Commerce ruling that has said it is duty bound to settle a $400-millon bill for tanks sold to Iran. In the deal dating back almost 40 years, Tehran paid for 1,750 tanks yet only received 185. And then came the Iranian revolution and Whitehall deemed the agreement null and void; while pocketing the rather hefty large change. All of which, of course, may or may not be ransom by another name. One (unnamed) British minister knows exactly what to call this: yet another example of Tehran conducting foreign policy by way of hostage-taking; whereas his country has the equally dishonourable reputation for effecting regime change via military intervention and decimation and all that discordant jazz. Thus the spotlight deflects from Bojo the Foreign Secretary to the Iranians, who are always somehow on the make; forever trying to get one over on the peace-loving West. In other words, if it hadn’t been Ms Zaghari-Ratcliffe it would have been something else.

Yet this would be a dangerous narrative to push. For all concerned. Especially given recent American and Saudi manoeuvres to have Iran regionally isolated, while choking its allies. With the Israelis all the while watching from behind the curtain that has yet to give its final call; for, quite simply, the show must go on. Thus now is the time for Britain to act smart. And start negotiating with Iran over this and other legitimate demands. After all, there is a more moderate regime at the helm in Tehran. This is not to deny that there is problem when it comes to that country and human rights. But bluntly put, Britain is hardly in a position to lecture anyone on this front. Moreover, it’s about time good ol’Blightly went on a refresher course of sorts; a timely reminder that democracy and human rights can never have a solid foundation when imposed by the barrel of someone else’s gun. Engagement and consensus is the better way forward. As is the realisation that no one nation, no one civilisation has a monopoly on any of this. And who knows, Iran may well be in the mood to play genuine ball. If only to irk a certain unquiet American.

But one thing is clear. BoJo the Foreign Secretary must go. He has proved himself a very real liability. Not just to the government. But to British citizens everywhere.

The writer is the Deputy Managing Editor, Daily Times. She can be reached at mirandahusain@me.com and tweets @humeiwei

Published in Daily Times, November 16^th 2017.