Daily Times

When deserted and left alone by their own dear ones, old homes become a convenient abode for elderly people to spend their rest of life although in pang of parting and dejection of solitary living.

With changing societal dynamics and children sometimes shying away of their duties to even take care of their own parents, old age homes will be increasingly becoming a necessity to cater the needs of abandoned parents and relatives.

May be these are deteriorating ethical values, lack of commitment and responsibilities or financial constraints of offspring to bear the old age expenditures of their parents, but this phenomenon was badly affecting our social fabric and bonds of relationships. The situation is equally grim in both rural and urban areas where children are often seen complaining of their parents simply ignoring Allah’s commands elaborated in the Holy Quran about duties and reward for taking care of elderly parents, in return of the pain they bore in their upbringing.

Rehana Ashraf, in her late 70s and presently residing at Bint Fatima Foundation, tells a gloomy saga of changing values and journey of her life, marked by struggle, family conflicts and resilience.

“My life story is a blend of heritage and hardship. My mother hailed from Kashmir and father had roots in Afghanistan. My husband, a businessman in Quetta, passed away years ago, leaving me to navigate life’s challenges alone,” she said in a melancholy voice. “Two of my children had died and I was surviving with the remaining two – a son and a daughter. But, actions of surviving son caused me immense pain.”

She revealed that after her husband’s demise, her son took control of family assets, properties, bank balances and vehicles. “He (my son) withdrew sums of money from bank accounts and claimed ownership of properties including the house she once used to live in with her late husband. Later, he sold house and refused to support me, leaving me homeless.”

“So, two years ago, overwhelmed by depression and loneliness, I sought refuge at the foundation to find some solace and emotional stability,” she said and expressed despair on her son’s lack of compassion. “My son neither contacted me nor inquired about my well-being during these two years despite earning significant income from properties he controls.”

“I raised my children with love and care, always praying for their safety and success. Yet, in my old age, the son whom I once thought to be supportive in my old age had abandoned me. But, I never cursed him, believing instead, what I am suffering is my destiny.”

Her story is a poignant reminder of the struggles many elderly mothers face, especially in societies where they expect their children would be their strength in later years. Yet, many are deserted like Rehana, who is still steadfast against the challenges.

The story of Rashida Bibi, another elderly mother living in Heaven Homes Bani Gala more or less highlights identical issues as for people like her, living alone after the death of their spouses, sometimes becomes too difficult.

Therefore, moving to an old age home not only ensures basic necessities like shelter and meals but also a bit of contentment. Availability of religious education, leisure activities and opportunities to visit places outside the facility illustrates how such homes can offer a supportive environment.

As societies continue to evolve and responsibility of caring the aging siblings falls on shoulders of state, it becomes important for state to find ways to provide aging people a compassionate and respectful environment for spending last span of their lives with dignity.

Cognizant of rapidly changing situation, the government enacted Pakistan Baitul Mal’s (PBM) Act that provides to establish PBM Old Homes, initially one each at Provincial and Regional Headquarters as a pilot project for senior citizens above 60 years.

These old homes would provide aging people basic necessities of life like boarding, lodging, food, clothing, medical care and recreation. The main objective of this initiative, besides security, shelter and physical support, is to help destitute people with love and hope by providing family like environment. .

Initially, Social Welfare Department had established first old age home in Lahore. Later, six more were established in Multan, Rawalpindi, Faisalabad, Narowal, Sahiwal and Toba Tek Singh. These homes have capacity to accommodate total 300 persons with 50 residents at each facility and every Senior Citizen above 60 in Punjab is eligible for admission without discrimination of gender, caste, creed or religion.

“The challenges faced by older citizens highlight an urgent need for comprehensive policy interventions and innovative solutions,” remarked Saba Sadiq, Parliamentary Secretary for Ministry of Human Rights. “The government and stakeholders have begun addressing these needs through various initiatives aimed at improving quality of life for senior citizens.”

However, she mentioned to some gaps like specialized wards for older citizens at hospitals, enhanced facilities at old homes and revival of our noble traditions of caring for elders.

With older population expected to rise dramatically in coming decades, a cohesive national strategy is essential to address their problems. This strategy must prioritize healthcare, legal protection and societal support to ensure dignified and fulfilling lives for them.