Sincere apology prevents one from drowning into a pool of unending trouble

Author: Bushra Zafar Khan

Over the centuries, there is a pile of tales left unsaid, accumulating around-the-clock, multiplying into toxic cells giving rise to cancerous matter, that would burst prevailing over everyone as a cyclone or would be buried under sheets of soil, forever.

This complete pandemonium is met by the innocents and especially those who are highlighted as wrong doers.

It’s never too late to start again with an apology. Just like the sun who never feels exhausted in showing up every other day. According to the research and opinions of the masses, we found out a number of stories left unsaid or understood poorly that caused withering of the relationships.

There are few actions that when take place, the person at once says ‘sorry’ which is an automatic reaction. But there also stands a few actions that are completely natural and don’t always require apologies as in sneezing, dropping something by bumping into something, or bumping into someone by mistake maybe due to some unpleasant or awkward circumstance that occurs naturally.

However, there are certain ways to apologize and varieties of apologies. Out of the varieties, we are more inclined towards two – one is an instant called ‘Active Apology – and the second one is called ‘Costly Apologies’. If a person adopts these two kinds of apologies in his/her life then life would be extremely easily and puzzled free. As a result, the use of the former technique, will help you 80 percent in avoiding errors and mistakes that could force you to make costly apologies someday.

Effective Apology and Costly Apology, these two if added into life’s routine, can help save a lot of troubles, misapprehensions, conflicts, second thoughts, over thinking and destruction of relationships that are built investing ample time, enduring a lot of pain and adding a lot of passion and enthusiasm. Now going deeper into the conversation, let’s shed light on a few published Journals regarding apologies and then get to its final conclusion.

The author Beverly Engel in ‘The Power of an Apology’, emphasises us to stay rather confident without bending over as it makes one loses self-respect. “It can give a certain kind of person permission to treat you poorly or even abuse you.” Warns Engel

Whereas another study says that using the word ‘sorry’ as your buy word, lessens the impact for a sincere apology in future as its warrant.

Another study over apology published in a journal Frontiers of Psychology says that it becomes annoying and exhausting, when someone is intentionally making a mistake as in rejecting some plan or refusing to be part of something or doing something at the eleventh hour and wrapping this whole situation into a blanket of apology.

Moreover, a study published in ‘European Journal of Social psychology’ says that people who confidently refuse to apologize are found to have boosted shots of greater self-esteem, integrity and power in their blood.

Whereas, Karina Schuman says, “A lot of people don’t apologize simply because these self-defensive processes kick in and they come up with all kinds of reasons why they shouldn’t apologies,” Schuman says. They push blame onto the other person, they think of excuses, all the situational factors that caused them to behave the way they did.”

While concluding this whole Pandora box of how and why there is so much need to apologize is somehow clear. No doubt, there are different opinions of different authors and researchers and masses but as a whole, we all are well aware and do completely agree with the fact that apology made at first can save you from drowning into a pool of unending and unimaginable troublesome series. Also a sincere and serious apology made later by the wrong doer to save an endangered relationship at any cost is a ‘costly apology’ that can be made at a stage when it’s too late for making an effective apology and the relationship is already in danger.

Making an apology helps clear the path for two people by plucking out the toxic traces out of their way, to let things flow smoothly.

Therefore, why not? Muster up your courage, go ahead. Yes! You can do it. Claps!

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