Daily Times

Today, I am going to violate the late William Safire’s cardinal rule about op-ed columns. For a change, I will talk of more than three issues in the same article. The first issue is a serious personal gripe. For eight years, I have been writing an entirely erudite and even if I say so myself, an extremely brilliant and widely admired column for this newspaper. During these eight years, I have not even once been approached by any property magnate, member of the deep state or any foreign agency with any offer, not even that of a free lunch let alone of millions of rupees, expensive cars or exotic foreign trips. This is enough to throw me into a terrible hissy fit like that of Rumplestiltskin.

Now to the burning topic of the week, the story of the ‘prodigal son’. In this matter, the most honourable Judges of the Supreme Court of Pakistan (SC) have given a recent verdict in which they have included verses from the classical Persian poet, Hafiz-e-Shiraz. The last time the honourable judges resorted to poetry they chose poems in English, so at least this time they have as I had suggested in these pages, decided to go with poetry from our tradition. Since the honourable judges are resorting to poetry, perhaps I might also quote a classical Urdu poet, Hakeem Momin Khan Momin, to sum up my understanding of this issue: Uljha hai paon yaar ka zulf-e-daraz mein-lo aap apne daam mein sayyad aa gaya. The translation of this verse is a bit complicated but in essence, it is about the enchantress that uses her long tresses to trap others getting entangled in them herself. (Think Rapunzel, and apologies to the memory of Momin.)

Between the media meltdown, the problem of the wayward son and the Prime Minister’s (PM) disqualification, what it seems is that we are rapidly moving towards the finale of a Shakespearian tragedy. From an objective perspective, it is clear that no good can possibly come from what is going on. A friend of mine has been warning me for almost four years that things are inexorably moving towards their ‘logical conclusion’ (mantaqi anjaam). What this will be remains to be seen but what is clear is that now finally the ‘end is near’. The only question is that who is the Macbeth and who will be the ‘Macduff’ in this scenario.

The next issue is the question of dual citizens and their loyalty to the Pakistani state. First, I wish to point out that virtually every member of ‘civil society’ I have come across during my last eight years in Pakistan wishes to leave Pakistan. Essentially people that are running Pakistan today would all rather be elsewhere. As I suggested in a column a while ago, most of them think of Pakistan as the place to make their fortunes and once that is done, move elsewhere. Many dual citizens on the other hand have already lived abroad, made it there and are now willing to return to the ‘homeland’, suffer the heat, dust, dirt and corruption just so that they can serve the country of their origin. If I had a choice, who among these two groups would I prefer to see running this country? The answer is obvious.

Now to the rather irritating problem of ‘load shedding’. Here again a few weeks ago, I had mentioned in a column perhaps only partly in jest that our then minister of load shedding had a diabolical plan up his sleeve. The idea was to decrease the amount of electricity available to the point where perhaps even for a day there would be no electricity at all, a null point if you may. From then on, electrical supply would be restored gradually to where it is now but this time it would be ‘load restoration’ and no longer load shedding. Looks like the PPP government is following that plan, but it also seems to have other more important worries and distractions right now. The PM, like Richard III, is probably sitting out there somewhere in an air-conditioned room muttering, “A horse, a horse! My kingdom for a horse!”

About the bizarre massive iron and steel ‘bridges for nobody’ being rapidly built over every road in Lahore, our Chief Minister (CM) of the Punjab seems to have given up on getting all the roads he has demolished rebuilt before the next elections but the bridges are being built apace. I suppose the family iron-mongering business has to make enough money as soon as possible to pay for the upcoming elections and possibly for all the ‘long marches’ that will need to be carried out. As an aside, has anybody else noticed that our CM in his recent TV appearances is starting to look a bit peaked? Is Imran Khan (IK) getting to him?

And that brings me to IK and his party, the PTI. I have been extremely sceptical about the PTI in the past but a recent incident has made me reconsider my ideas about it. My driver who lives in a small town about 50 kilometres from Lahore has been complaining about his ‘meter reader’ who demands a monthly ‘payoff’ of Rs 300 to send him the correct bill. Since he does not pay him off, he routinely gets billed an exorbitant amount every month. After trying the usual official channels, my driver went to the local PTI office and asked for their help. He was told to arrange a small ‘public’ meeting at his house that the PTI paid for. They took his bill and paid it at the real rate (he paid the money) and sent him the receipt. They also told him that if he gets another incorrect bill, he should get in touch with them again. My driver, a long time Pakistan Muslim League-Nawaz supporter, is now a PTI supporter. CM Sahib, be very worried.

The writer has practised and taught medicine in the US and in Pakistan. He can be reached at smhmbbs70@yahoo.com