Feeling so lonely

Author: Shamim Masih

Pakistan, a Muslim majority country, has a rather small Christian population, about three or five percent. Among them, 98 percent live below the poverty line. In rural areas, they live under the pressure of their landlords and in urban areas most of them work as labourers, barely making ends meet. I know I cannot eradicate poverty or change their social status but I can raise some awareness. Churches and parishes are busy making incredible profits by getting donations and selling religious properties to the public, charging for community services. If the church manages its funds properly, it could easily change their status but they do not want to do this. Let me say that religious leaders have become autocrats and the west is busy in filling filthy buckets. In this situation, I am the only voice among these big bosses and feel so lonely and scared. I do not write for money but for the rights of Christians; money matters only to meet daily needs. I write for the people who suffer for nothing — Christians are the most marginalised segment of society, like me. God fearing westerners send donations for these people to change their living standards but these do not reach them and their living remains the same. I endeavour to reach everywhere because there is so much turmoil. Sometimes, I do not even have the money to travel and I have to borrow it to reach a certain location. Yes, the British Pakistani Christian Association (BPCA) shares my travel expenses to some extent. Due to the disconnection of Internet services, I could not publish anything during the last couple of weeks.

Lying in bed on a lazy winter evening during the curfew in the city of Rawalpindi due to the tense sectarian situation, my wife reached out to me and told me how embarrassing it was that I was working on a noble cause while the response was not overwhelming. The challenging thing is that most of us do not offer the same kind of kindness to others — we reserve it for ourselves. People look forward to me doing a lot for them but do not bother if I am in trouble. Undertaking the vocation of journalism in a country like Pakistan, which is dominated by Muslim religious extremists, is not easy, especially when you write about religious minorities. Pakistan is perhaps ranked as the third most dangerous country for reporting. The country also has one the highest numbers of journalists threatened, kidnapped and killed.

My aim is to create a peaceful environment in society and to help eliminate human rights violations/persecution through my writings as I bring the plight of many brave people under the spotlight before the whole world. It is not my aim to write and do anything against anyone or to blackmail anyone; I only wish to highlight the facts for that is my responsibility. In this situation, black sheep feel uncomfortable and they blame me in many ways.

Pakistan is where those working to change an incredibly hostile climate for free speech have found themselves under fierce attack. In this situation, journalists do not dare to write about these activities but I do. Being a Christian journalist, it has indeed become more dangerous to write on minorities issues. Many newsrooms forbid their journalists from reporting these kinds of incidents and so it happens with me as well. Apart from my routine work, I usually write on minorities issues but, when I do so, my editor tells me to keep a low profile or to stop what I am doing for a while; when I do write some articles of this nature, they are printed without a byline.

I wish I could provide education to those in my community who cannot afford it. I feel so lonely because I am the only voice for my people while the people who are in a position to support their cause do not care.

The writer is a human rights activist and is working as a stinger, specialising in writing about minority rights for various national and international papers

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