Comedy in tragedy

Author: Ali Malik

Unlike what the mainstream media believes, portrays, or covers, I have always found a PML-N government to be a comic affair. Ever since their first stints of power in my teen years, every time they have been in power, in their desire to look ultra-smart they end up providing comic relief to the observers. This time around, however, the affair seems to be on steroids. What followed the Army Public School (APS) attack has sealed the deal for someone looking for ultimate comic relief. And the magnitude of the tragedy that it follows and the problems that we face makes this comedy even more tragic.

We are dealing with a government that seems to have no clue of the problems and how to deal with them. In all seriousness, trying to solve them without a clue, it is creating a classic comedy. On security policy, all it is resorting to is a series of All Parties Conferences (APCs). Even that would have been fine had the agenda been initiated by the government. But the missing entity from all these conferences is the government itself. Yes, Mr Prime Minister does make a feeble-toned speech with strong rhetoric (that actually makes it look all the more comic) but in the end one does not see the government agenda setting or even contributing to agenda setting. Even in its perilous, pathetic state, it is Pakistan People’s Party that seems to be leading and the APCs looked like a dialogue and consultation between PPP and the army. The government in power seems to have yielded to the armed forces on all policy fronts.

And this indeed is even more comic because flashback 10 months and this government was trying to dominate the national policy space. From the Geo incident to the Musharraf trial, it was bent on asserting civilian supremacy. Ten months down the road and the tables are turned in what is the most complete surrender of any civilian government in the history of Pakistan.

This main comic affair is followed by comedy on the peripheries. In response to one of the worst terror attacks in the country, the interior minister wanted to regulate the amount of bread loaves one could buy at the bread shops. And then he appears in the Senate, ending his ‘boycott’ of the upper house and roars at the ministers who are not attending the session (which by the way is more or less the entire cabinet). Pressers by the information minister make even the serious sort go tipsy laughing. And then there are the speech writers of the prime minister and chief minister of Punjab who are bent on dragging the fight against terrorism into every speech of theirs, even if it is related to the revamping of the sewerage system of Jia Bagga, without naming the Taliban.

We could have afforded acts of comedy on issues like bread loaves and the Jia Bagga sewerage system but capital punishment was introduced to give a stern message to the terrorists and this turning into a laughing matter undermines the effectiveness of the measure to begin with.

This comedy of errors creates some doubt that the PML-N may deliberately be trying to do all this to undermine the Army’s proactive push against the terrorists post-Zarb-e-Azb and particularly post-APS attack. Just when I too am very apprehensive about the PML-N’s terrorist connections, I have more faith in its ability to act humorously (for lack of a more polite expression). When Kamran Akmal got cleared of match fixing charges for the famous Sydney Test, the best comment was: “Hence proved he is actually a lousy wicketkeeper.” With its comic acts, I would tend to subscribe to a similar opinion about the PML-N too.

It is imperative to attack and correct the myth of PML-N’s competence. In the 1990s and now again it has been a party known for its comedy of errors. From its decisions on economic and energy fronts to its handling of foreign and security policies, it has proved to be one big bunch of inept sorts. We need to register this, remember this, and keep reminding everyone of it. We and our younger generations can ill-afford such stand up comedians at the very top of national decision-making.

The writer can be reached on twitter at @aalimalik

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