I’m right and you’re wrong. Right now as I write these words I feel I too am affected (with respect to this article) by the same mental condition that I detest. The reason I feel that way is because I think we all want to prove that whatever we say is the way it is supposed to be. Tolerance is a rarity. Democracy may be what we want, or what we advertise for public consumption. Yet we all display the hallmark of a dictator: an inability to consider that someday we may need to accept a mistake and apologise. To err is human, to forgive, divine. Somebody just tweeted that phrase and the first thing that came to mind is how often politicians admit to having erred — not as often as it is supposed to be. I guess that makes most of them something inferior to being ashraf-ul-makhlooqat (the best of beings). In our race to win, we forget that we are human. In our arguments, we display the clear denial of facts and blatant twisting of words just to prove that we are the winners and the ones on the other side are losers. In doing so, we lie to ourselves as much as the mirror on the wall lied to the evil queen about who was the fairest of them all. I, me, myself. It is always about one’s own self. To avoid admitting defeat, we lie. To avoid conceding that we are human and prone to error, we deceive; we justify even that which is wrong. All this is done to protect one’s self-righteousness and project one’s abilities even if they do not exist. We want to hold onto a position of power just for the sake of it. We advertise ourselves repeatedly and consider an insult doing something not becoming of the elevated position we hold. We become the imprisoned; the ego becomes the jail cell. No pain, no gain. That somewhat reminds me of the tagline of a famous fabric detergent advertisement: no learning without stains. Every mistake provides an opportunity to reflect, analyse, learn and correct. To the egomaniac, admittance of having erred is painful indeed. Yet, it is in these painful moments that we learn the benefits and the losses; what is right and what is wrong; the good and the bad. The ego prevents one from acknowledging mistakes and so shields the individual from learning after a bad experience. There really is not much difference between egomaniacs, control freaks and dictators. They all think whatever they say is the final word and that whatever they think is the gold standard. That last category (dictator) we all think we know so well as the men in khakis is but a state of mind seen in even those that portray themselves as pioneers of democracy. Their ego is their curse. Adaptability and resilience are traits uncommon amongst them. While they may be the most democratic and popular choice, one fine day, time takes the best of them and leaves them with a dark reality: their stubborn ego. With the passage of time, they all fail to learn and respond positively to the changing environment around them. They start out as those on the right side of the fence but end up on the wrong side since the fence is constantly shifting, but their own minds are chained by their ego to that one place where they were since the beginning of their stint in power. Their denial in recognising the changing realities prevents them from adapting and correcting course. The result is what we experience every time: failure and disappointment, heroes yesterday but villains today. Every ruler starts out with a plan in mind to achieve some goals. En route to destination are an infinite number of variables affected by human judgement and error. While our rulers may start out with the right plan, the same plan may not work for the whole length of the journey if the possibility of having made a mistake and human error are not accounted for. To consider such possibilities, one has to accept that their plan is not perfect and may become obsolete in the face of changing circumstances at some point in future. A part of the difference between a ruler and a leader is in their ego: while the former actively pushes his agenda on others because he thinks his plan is the best plan, the latter inspires people into coming along on his journey and delivers a better outcome regardless of the uncertainties faced along the way. To handle successfully the enormous challenges faced by our people today, we need out-of-the-box thinking and new ideas. The ego in all of us prevents us from realising the shortcomings of our preferences, loyalties, and judgements. It binds us and restricts us from adapting to new challenges. It is the prison we must break out of to shed old ideas and embrace new ones. The key to freedom from one’s ego is acceptance of being human and thus the inherent weaknesses. Of course, I do not expect everyone to agree with me. But then again, I am the egomaniac: I’m right and you’re wrong. The writer is a young member of the healthcare fraternity with a keen eye for current affairs. He can be reached at Twitter on þ@ASilentKnight