Dear Mathira & Rose,
My nikah took place a while back. My mother-in-law lives abroad. So does my husband but in a different country than his mother’s. The problem is that she calls me randomly whatever time of the day and expects me to do a video call with her. I live with my parents and siblings. I feel a little insecure doing these video calls with her. Please tell me how I can politely refuse these calls. I discussed this with my husband and he says his mother does it out of love and I should oblige. I’m a very private person actually. I once mustered up the courage and told her also but she got offended.
Regards,
Private Bride
Mathira’s Advice:
Distance can be annoying sometimes. Those who love us want to hold a video call to take a look at us. Why don’t you set a schedule for these calls? Tell her it’s better this way. Schedule is a must. Tell her not to get offended by this. Marriage is all about making it work and sacrifices. Don’t completely refuse doing a video call. Just tell her you will but at a set time during the day which will be good for the both of you.
If you want sisterly advice on any issue, DM me @real_mathira
Rose’s Advice:
There could be two situations here. Could be that your mother-in-law really likes you and is just excited to have an additional daughter to her family. Her son’s also not with her and she calls you because she considers you a part of her family. Maybe she genuinely wants to know how you’re doing and what’s up with you the same way our mothers do when we’re not around. Your husband has also reassured you of her intentions. Let’s not look at this from any other perspective.
If you want sisterly advice on any issue, DM me @rosemohammed777