Online bullying can be as hurtful as the physical kind and sometimes more so when it leads to an offline connection. As well as causing anxiety and upset for teenagers, dealing with it when it happens can be a huge worry for parents. It can be hard for parents to get teenagers who are victims of cyberbullying to talk about their experience as they sometimes do not want to let you know what’s happening. This can be because they don’t want anyone to know what they’re up to online, or they are worried that they might lose online access. Other times teenagers hope they can work things out by themselves, though the experts say that bottling it up can put a teen at higher risk of depression or anxiety. All of this reinforces how important it is for parents to be able to identify the signs of cyberbullying, set ground rules on Internet use and to make sure their teenagers are comfortable talking about online issues. Signs that your teenager is being cyberbullied: SUDDENLY CHANGING HABITS — when they were glued to their device now suddenly don’t want to go online, it might be to avoid bullies – just like they would in the real world. A sudden spike in activity might also suggest they’re stressing out about something that’s happening online. COVERING-UP — when they don’t want anyone to see their screen, won’t use their computer where you can see it, switch off or change screens whenever someone walks by – that’s a red flag that something unusual may be going on. DROPPING HINTS — when they hint at a problem by saying things like ‘I have no friends’ or ‘why are people so mean?’ Sometimes a drop in self-esteem can affect posture or tone too. FEELING ANXIOUS — when they’re nervous when receiving a message alert when you’re around, or suddenly get angry and slam their laptop shut. Or their mood changes after being on social media. SHOWING DISINTEREST — when they’re uneasy about going to school, lose interest in regular activities or have trouble sleeping, or become withdrawn from friends and family. What to do if you suspect your teenager is a victim of cyberbullying? SHOW SUPPORT — it’s important for parents to have a conversation that says that there’s someone there to help. That means not judging online behaviour or actions and making sure the victim doesn’t feel that the bullying is somehow their fault. DEVELOP AN ACTION PLAN — work together to solve the problem, which might include talking to the parents of the cyberbully or taking the issue to a teacher or school counsellor. Schools will have zero tolerance when it comes to any form of bullying. MAKE IT OFFICIAL – you can report offensive action or material to most online sites and services. Facebook’s Bullying Prevention Hub is a resource for teens, parents and educators seeking support and help for issues related to bullying and other conflicts. If it’s a physical threat, then the police are an option too. Cyberbullying can be a harrowing experience for parents and their teenagers who are being victimised online. The key thing to do is to take the problem seriously and work together to find a way to stay safe online. The writer can be reached at ambar_ahmed@hotmail.com and Tweets at @ambarahmed_